Captain’s log, aisle-date 70224.9

Captain’s log, aisle-date 70224.9: We have encountered Homo Snifficus Returnus, the shopper who pops every lid, inhales deeply, then stealthily returns the item to the shelf.
Their nasal quests create a swirling nebula of Lavender-Coconut-Grandma-Purse that has incapacitated two ensigns and the produce section.
Attempts at containment failed; the creature simply muttered “meh” and moved on to the next unsuspecting candle.
Recommendation: new prime directive, if you sniff it, you ship it to checkout.
End log.